I hate my life...yet i don't

Why me. What a selfish thing to say right? I usually never ever say that cause i know people have it harder than me. but its getting really hard for me. first school problems, then friends, then just people. now family. i dont get why it seems everything/everyone is against me. i keep pushing through it and keep saying "well life isnt fair" and just deal with it. but gawd. Now i found out today, that my dad is dying and they stopped doing operations on him. damn his alcohol. so now hes probably going to die soon. and i cant even see him. now i will never get to see him. i cant even go to his funeral cause his drunk wife (step mom) would (no joke) try to beat up my mom and be all bitc*y to trevor and me. so we might not even have our own service thing until either christmas or 6 months from now. i really dont want to go..but i do. this just isnt fair. its almost like everything is against me. but i know people have it harder, i just wish some people would help yet sometimes i dont let them. i dont know whats going on. my weekend is ruined. its not fair how so many kids at my school and have a great life. i keep tryn to get my life towards that but then something else knocks me down. i'll keep trying though, i want to get away from everybody, go to college..just have a new life. that would be nice.

Mach Study

Oh my gosh i dont even know why i'm even metioning mach but BAM!!! Kati and I are a great study group I'm so happy we work so well together. The test is sooo insane and we have been have 4-5 hour study sessions!! it's intense..but it was also fun haha

"I prefer Tax over War" and then the post-it flag fight or w/e it was lol. Good (and frustrating) times. We both were so sick of Mach we threw our books down haha (apparently i was more violent...psh..). lol Well I personally am so happy and i feel so good and complete, i just need to memorize and BAM we should be good (I hope!). lol Now, i will also be able to sleep in!!!!!!!! Yayyyy! Gosh i love having good/reliable friends/study partners!

MACH STUDY LIBRARY:

Family

Mmm..yea..soo I found "lost" family members. Well, not really lost but I've never had ..contact with anyone over on the Wyer side of the family. I found Brian Wyer on myspace and he oddly enough remembers me after 15 years lol. Its so weird finding family...kind of awkward for me since I dont really know anyone. My brother of course knows them but its kind of a thing where i wonder if they know I exist or not lol. I'm in kind of a shock, this feels really weird to find family haha. Just needed to let that lil bit out lol

Politics

Oh my gosh...
Mainly I'm just mad at the people who call Obama a terrorist. Is that really all you could think of to use against him?? really?? you people are so ignorant!! stop calling him a terrorist!
good to know MANY people in our country are still very IGNORANT and racist. You guys don't know crap about the muslim people for one and you should probably do your research before you bash on him. Get over yourselves.

Free Speech??

Ook...sooo in GJ yesterday, Sarah Palin (*suffocates self*) came to Grand Junction and a bunch of college students protested (yay). BUT ....the college students were protesting and the police litteraly TACKELED them. That was just lame... in my opinon, thats a diss on Freedom of Speech. It's like people aren't allowed to not like Palin. I would like your thoughts on this.

Heres the Video

To go back to those Disney days...

How many times I wish I could go back to the Disney days. As a little kid you see the movies and the music enchants you and your eyes glow with dreams. You believe everything is just so happy and joyous and you really are a happy kid when it comes to Disney. Walt was a genius, making kids have dreams and make them so happy. You just think of all kinds of dreams to "wish upon a star" on and you believe for such a long time. As you get older, its like your heart fades, you know when you see or hear Disney your heart feels full and light? unless thats just me...but it doesn't feel so full or light anymore, i think this is part of the "losing innocence" discussion i had in Hon. 10 about Catcher in the Rye. It's also just with reality breaking through and when i watch the Disney movies or listen to the classic soundtracks I wish (really hard) I could go back to those days. Sort of sad I know (sorry Kati) but man, i miss those days so much. I do know, I believe, that i will always love Disney.

-Almond

Sarah Palin

Ugh, politics can be very frustrating and of course, since i have a debate class, we talk about politics all the time! Usually, I stay out of it or I have my belief but decide not to argue since there will just be chaos. When McCain chose Palin as his VP....oh my gosh I was first of all scared to death! Second, I thought this was a somewhat smart choice of McCain but laughed later that she was from Alaska...which is pretty seperate..in a a sense..from the rest of the states. Finally, I personally freaked out when my teachers said many of the Hilary voters would vote for Sarah Palin just because she is a woman!! I personally, am upset and embarassed that so many women will vote for Palin just for that ONE reason. Now, even though I'm only 15, apparently I realize much more than a lot of other americans do; the reason for this, mostly, is for my World History Middle Ages class. That class is one of the greatest classes, I have learned SO much from that class! But anyways...women were inferior since basically the beginning of time (except for the muslim faith but im not going to that). I understand how women want to have a great leader to show that women are just as valuable and hard working as men but when you choose someone like Palin you are embarassing us all!! She (in my opinon and many others) is stupid and full of herself and really, if or when she gets VP (and probably president cause McCain will croak soon enough) will probably kill us all.
If women want to show that they are equal and as valuable to men, they should first probably pick someone who is..oh..idk...SMART!?!? Sarah Palin as a leader is such an embarassment and once she has power, she is going to be the #1 example of why women should be inferior.

This really, is what scares me...is how dumb so many people are to not realize this. So basically, I guess women are going to stay inferior...since so many American women are stupid enough to choose Sarah Palin as a leader for all the wrong reasons. Just cause she is a women is really pathetic and ignorant, so women will always be inferior and it will just be harder for the actual smart women to show at least some are able to have a brain.

The end...

-Almond

Little Kids..

..are so adorable! Today while i was at the park with jill, this little kid came to the park with his 'rents and just openly started talking to us! He was the one of the cutest lil kids i have ever seen too!! Jill and I were like "awww" the whole time!! haha. He randomly started a conversation with us:

"Hi my name is Jordan!"

"Hi I'm Jackie!"

"I'm 3!"

"Wow your a big boy now huh? You're pretty old!"

"yeaa, I don't wear diapers anymore!"

"wow thats awesome!"

and then we left ...sadly lol.

but gawd he was so cute, i said that 5 million times to Jill when we were walking back to my house!!

GAW!!

Don't you love it..

when a guy says your cute!?!?

seriously...

you just feel sooo BUBBLY inside :)

Fate is...odd, weird, strange, crazy, overwhelming...you choose.

It's interesting how fate is. I could go into such a deep thought/explanation/opinon about it while writing this...I really think about it everyday. Its so odd. For example, if you set your mind on some things, like what will or won't happen, the opposite usually comes out...unless of course you force it to be what you thought. Like "Today, I have a feeling it's going to be a bad day" and then it turns out moderate/good or it is a bad day because you forced it or let it be. Its so strange. Fate is also overwhelming. Just realizing how it works (some) and what will happen can be a real brain stretcher.

So not too long ago, I was filling out passport (mom, brett and I) forms. Of course, the airport people are very detailed of your life. So i had to ask mom when my father's birthday was...and oddly enough...it's tomorrow. This is what shocked me with fate. An awkward moment and depression came over us but we pushed it aside of course but...wow I've been thinking about that for a bit. Many times people wonder if stuff like that has a reason behind it or if its just coincedence. Of course, I too wonder about this but I try not to think too much about it because you never know what thinking about it will do to your fate also.
Very intense I know...

-Almond

Happy :]

I got a car :]

I was expecting a piece of crap...in a way...cause you know, first car and all so I totally was fine with it. But Brett surprised me big time and i got an awesome car! Jill says it fits me :] and i always trust her opinon :D lol. I agree also haha. It's exciting. It's a 2002 Honda CR-V!

Obesession

Ok, forever, I have not been obsessed over a guy celebrity. All my friends have their own little obsessions. I could never get into because i thought it wasn't worth it. But, I think I've finally found my "obsesssion!"

May I introduce....JUDE LAW!!

Everytime I watch The Holiday, I fall even more "obsessivly in love" with him. As Savannah would say "I want to have his babies!!" haha. Gawd, I love this movie soooooo much! Jude Law is THE obsession! :) <3

-Almond

Barely Breathing

Highschool: People are ridiculous and my classes are so insane. With all these honors classes its so much pressure not to fall behind. But taking a regular class would be too easy..
In highschool..its sometimes hard to ignore people. People overreact, are dramatic, and still can't get over themselves. Also, there's those people who hate your guts so when you are near them you get the worst vibes in the world. I think so many people are going to have it so hard in life. It's also retarded of me to ask "Why can't things be easier?". Now, I'm not too big on the whole dramatic sayings people claim like "Life is hard but getting through it is worth it."..well something like that.. lol. I'm so brain-fried. Sadly, things that usually calm me down are not abtainable now..
Only music and a few people can help me out with this stress of stupidity.
Also, why does talking to a boy have to be so complicated??
Why can't we talk like "yo, whats up? hows things?" and joke around????
sheesh.
I Want to be in college so badly.
I want to actually live my life more...
This all could perhaps just be because it's only sophmore year for highschool.
I'm so restricted from things and i hate that!

Thank goodness for music.
On a completely different topic...
Don't you love it when you have your own song?
Like you feel you own it in a way?
One friend's song is Dig-Incubus
while another friend's is millions of "happy" songs lol.
mine is Barely Breathing by Duncan Sheik
which is oddly enough exactly how i feel right now being at highschool.
i always need 5,000 giant "sighs" and i still feel like i can't breathe :(

Highschool...is definately a life sucker.

-Almond

My brother!

Good thing he doesn't know i have a blog... haha
i love my bro
hes the definition of cool in every way!!
Trevor
21
Marine Core
Coolest Guy in the world
and girls adore him apparently.. *cough* kati *cough* lol
jk

Anyways hes so greatly fantastic!

-Almond

Crafty Math?

Today while i was shopping in the amazing Hobby Lobby, i was looking for pillow stuffing when i passed by my Geometry teacher. Yes, my GEOMETRY teacher.. lol. We both litteraly did double takes at each other and man it was awkward!! I mean, hes a cool teacher..but what are you doing at Hobby Lobby!??!? haha it was funny though. So now i know how cool my geom. teacher is... :]

-Almond

Sleepover-Kati's

Well that was a pretty snazzy sleepover :] pretty delicious too ;P what we made was an amazing creation. Mint Choco Mocktails (non alcoholic) are the definition of delicious flavor!

If you are a fan of delicious flavor:

Mint Chocolate chip ice cream + pina coloda juice (frozen juice) + coconut milk + hersheys syrup= amazing ness

if you want inscructions comment/message me :]

Continuing...
We watched (in this order):

National Treasure 2

Juno

Evolution

What a movie selection eh? Then we talked about the details of how our weddings would be. Then in the morning/afternoon we watched Edward Scissorhands!

and i think that night we had about 3 or 4 mocktails lol.

snazzy :]

-Almond